Kristen Schaal in an ad for Starburst fruit chews. You know, the candy that kids sell on subway cars to raise money for their basketball team uniforms — or to have some money in their pockets to keep them out of trouble, which implies that a lack of money is the very reason they do get into trouble. Anyway, I and everyone I know have a crush on Kristen because she is awesome. Just like Starburst fruit chews.